Tuesday, December 29, 2015

The Stage, the Breaks, and Vera

Having finished my shift at synagogue for volunteering, my supervisor told me that I can come back when things settle down.

I am very grateful for her to understand that I have too much crap going on behind the scenes.

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Reviews of the Year, Christmastime in Cleveland, and Vera

Hey Vera!  Are you going to do a recap of 2015?

Why? It's still 2015.

Thursday, December 17, 2015

Public Transit, Private Observations, and Vera

It's no secret. I take public transportation now to get where I need to go. That will happen when you, oh I don't know, sell your car and don't plan on buying another one for some time.

However in the 216 of things, the views of public transportation (or transit) are very strange.

Sunday, December 13, 2015

Womb Twin Survival, Hanging On Somewhere, and Vera

These past several days have been brutal.  And I mean brutal as fuck.

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

The Madamobile, Exhaustion, and Vera

Today was a bit of a sad day. I probably don't feel it like I should because good quality anti-depressants, but I digress.

Friday, December 4, 2015

Round Two of Their Royal Toothiness, Certified Buzzkills, and Vera

On this past Tuesday, I made a trip to the emergency room because the stomach was, once again, in pain.

After yet another pelvic exam and vaginal ultrasound, the doctors found, get this: TWO NEW CYSTS on my right ovary.

Monday, November 30, 2015

Conservation, Conversation, and Vera

I haven't talked much lately.

I mean, I haven't really opened up my yap and spoke over the past few days.

Saturday, November 28, 2015

Giving Thanks, Receiving Welcome, and Vera

Even though today in particular isn't a great day physically (severe pains from the lower abdomen are resurfacing where pain meds can not reach), I am thankful.

Even though I have lost some steam in my blog the few months, I am thankful.

Even though azzchickens get on my nerves like peanut butter on jelly, I am thankful.

Even though the money is not what it used to be, I am thankful.

Even though the Madamobile may be on her last legs, to the point where she will be sold in 2016, I am thankful.

I just am.  No rhyme or reason, I just am.

Friday, November 20, 2015

The Incredible Amateurish Review, My Big Fat Ukrainian-American Opinion, and Vera

This should be fun.

Today, I present to you a review of the album "The Incredible True Story" by Logic.  However, despite that I literally break down the songs and scenes one at a time, at least you can get a feel for what the album is really about, and my perception of the album (which I am safe to say, isn't the perception most people would get).

Here we go.

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

War, Peace, and Vera

Over the past several weeks, I've been irritated.

Constantly being reminded of things that I no longer want in my life. Every. Single. Day.

After a period of despair and consolation. I have decided that I had enough. That I am going to take matters into my own hands.

Friday, November 6, 2015

The Outlook, the Podcast, and Vera

I have some gnarly news to share with you. Get excited!

Sunday, November 1, 2015

Abusers, Empowerment, and Vera

(Edited on 20151204: the point was made)

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of abuse, assault, domestic violence, and rape. Reader discretion is advised.

Autistics Speaking Day, the Oberammergau Passion Play, and Vera



Note: this blog post discusses about grown (see "mature" or "adult") themes, and may not be suitable for a general audience. Reader discretion is advised. 

Monday, October 26, 2015

Autism Parents, Services for Autistic Adults, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of autistic individuals abused and/or murdered at the hands of their caregivers or family members.  Reader discretion is advised.

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Volunteering, Angry Hornets, and Vera

Dang blast it! I knew I forgot to touch on something positive that's happening lately.

Sunday, October 18, 2015

A Responsa, A Drosh, and Vera

Ah, yes!  Thanks for the reminder.

This was my sermon, called a drosh, that was given on Friday, October 16, 2015. (A link for the sermon can be found here; sorry about the side angle!)

Monday, October 12, 2015

An Anomaly, A Façade, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of ableist language, child abuse, domestic violence, and bullying. Reader discretion is advised.

Sunday, October 11, 2015

One Year, One Day, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of ableist slurs, domestic violence, suicide, child abuse, and rape.  Reader discretion is advised.

Monday, October 5, 2015

Nightmare Inducing Furniture, Routine on Repeat, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of an abusive family and a rapist. Reader discretion is advised.

Friday, September 25, 2015

Home Health Care, Sunshine, and Vera

When I first heard from the Emergency Room doctor tell me that this seroma needed to be packed and dressed in order to heal, I thought that was cool. Whatever.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

The Check Engine Light, Dry Sense of Self, and Vera

Why is it when life's toughest questions come to mind when someone is facing life's toughest challenges?

Sunday, September 13, 2015

All That Hype, A Long Season Ahead, and Vera

Now that most of the surgical nonsense is out of the way (I discovered the lozenges, drinking cold water, and ibuprofen are doing the trick for the throat while cotton gauze dressing [or pads], neosporin, and ginormous bandages are helping the open wound in the belly button to heal), it's time to get back into the swing of things. Like getting ready for the High Holy Days.

Nah, I'll worry about that later. I miss my sports.

Saturday, September 12, 2015

A Cute Uterus, Wrong Area of Pain, and Vera

Hey, Vera! Speak to me! Are you all right?

No. Heh.

Monday, September 7, 2015

The Calm Before the Storm, Last Minute Thoughts, and Vera

Welp, this is it.

In about 16 hours I will be going under the scope to get this fluffy toothy bastard off of the exterior of my uterus.

And I have about 9 hours left to shove all the food down my throat until I have to fast.

Friday, August 28, 2015

Running Around Headless, Parasites, and Vera

Well, I see I have been a bit neglectful towards this blog.  My bad.

I do have reasons why I was busy.  Honest, heh.

Friday, August 14, 2015

Football, Soccer, and Vera

Are you ready for some football?

Apparently, it depends on what part of the world you live in.

Monday, August 10, 2015

Schedules, Cecil, and Vera

Note: some of the names and/or genders of individuals and/or facilities mentioned in this blog post have been changed to respect their privacy and protect them from retaliation from the social media community. Nouns that have been changed will be marked with an asterisk (*).

Monday, August 3, 2015

Periscope, Partnerships, and Vera

A relatively new social media platform has caught my attention recently.  And my life has been improved because of it.

Saturday, August 1, 2015

The Clip, The Cookie, and Vera

Heh, you probably have no idea how long I have waited for this day.  A flapping year.  To celebrate my cookie.

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

A Cot, Natural Air Conditioning, and Vera

As I was laying in bed, trying to fall asleep so I can wake up early enough to attend weekly Torah study, I found myself seeing flashbacks of memories. The relatively cool air (at least it feels like it when you're several floors up inside a high-rise apartment) blowing ever so gently through my windows, took me back in time to a place where I spent a good majority of my years; my grandparents' house in my hometown of Lakewood, Ohio, USA.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

Failure to Appreciate the Organic Wonders of the Ability to Cope, To Deal or Not to Deal, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of abandonment, abuse, and use of sex for food and companionship. Reader discretion is advised.

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Parking, Violations, and Vera

Note: some of the names and/or genders of individuals and/or facilities mentioned in this blog post have been changed to respect their privacy and protect them from retaliation from the social media community. Nouns that have been changed will be marked with an asterisk (*).

Friday, July 17, 2015

A Moment, A Spa Resort, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of suicide, self-injury, invalidation of both disability and gender identity, ableism, and psychiatric units in hospitals. Reader discretion is advised.

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Independence, Freedom, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of abuse, addiction, and self-injury. Reader discretion is advised.

Monday, June 29, 2015

Incompetency, Breakdown, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of fat shaming, gaslighting, and child abuse. Reader discretion is advised.

Monday, June 22, 2015

Whoremoans, Jealousy, and Vera

Upon waking up this morning, I instantly felt like shit physically.  It only took a few minutes afterwards to feel shit emotionally and mentally. Now, usually, my bad days have been few and far between as of late. And that's good. Today, a bad day became to be.

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Human Decisions, The Galaxy, and Vera

I can already tell this summer is going to be a pain in the wahzoo.  The Lake Erie humidity is ready to choke all the bitches in the region.  And with temperatures staying well above 75 Fahrenheit, staying in my itty bitty studio apartment with no air conditioning is going to be a problem.  It has proven to be a problem already, due to the fact that over the past 36 hours, I have a grand total of 7 hours of sleep.  When it gets hot and/or humid, no sleep till Shaker.  At all.

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

A Memo Back to Turner, Oheroin, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of drug use and death from overdosing. Reader discretion is advised.

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Food Pantries, Humility, and Vera

The time period between my April paycheck and my May paycheck (okay, both are really my monthly allowances, heh), sucked. And I mean it super sucked. Having to wait anywhere from 4-5 weeks to get cash money to live is not the way to go. It's even worse when you pay almost all of your bills and buy some groceries, you don't have enough money to pay a $4.06 electric bill due the day before your next paycheck.

Welcome to hitting rock bottom.

Friday, May 29, 2015

The Speech, The Rest, and Vera

The following is what I presented during Friday night Shabbat service at Anshe Chesed Fairmount Temple in Beachwood, Ohio, on Friday, May 22, 2015.

Underdeveloped, Overexposed, and Vera

Hey Vera! Where in the hell have you been?

Heh, I got busy.

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Acceptance and Love, Self-Care, and Vera

Note: this post is part of the Autism Positivity Flashblog 2015 Series.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Bifocals, Buy Local, and Vera

A head shot of Vera Didenko.
Yeah, it's official.

My vision sucks canal water.

Saturday, May 9, 2015

Patience, Madness, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of self-harm and suicide. Reader discretion is advised.

Sunday, May 3, 2015

Motherhood, Aidan, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of abortion and rape. Reader discretion is advised.

Thursday, April 30, 2015

Ovarian Obstacles, Sinus Succotash, and Vera

Doctors. I can deal with them if they act like Dr. Gregory House. I can not deal with them if they can't treat the correct problem like Dr. Gregory House.

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Emergency Room, Insurgency Doom, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of blood, harming, rape, and descriptions of ER patients with life-threatening injuries. Reader discretion is advised.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Happy, Humbled, and Vera

Sometimes, folks stop along the way and smell some flowers. Other times, folks stop along the way and turn around to see how far they have come.

Friday, April 17, 2015

The Mikvah, Vindication, and Vera

Hey Vera! You didn't tell me about how your conversion to Judaism went. How was it?

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Inspiration, Pornography, and Vera

What do you think of when you read/hear the term "inspiration porn"?

Two Types of Holo, Family Links, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of suicide, genocide, and the Holocaust. Reader discretion is advised.

Monday, April 13, 2015

Parodies, Lost in Translation, and Vera

There are two groups on Facebook that have come to my attention lately. Both groups are both targeting autistic folks, giving them something to smile or chuckle over. They are parody groups, I call them, or groups intended to make fun or light of an original source.

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Depression, Persnickety Things, and Vera

In five days, I'm about to be spiritually reborn in the waters of a local community mikvah.

Yet today, I'm incredibly sad and feeling hopeless about tomorrow.

How can this be?

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Red, Blue, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of ableist language.  Reader discretion is advised.

Identity, the Formula, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of ableism and damaging therapy. Reader discretion is advised.

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Money, Problems, and Vera

Today marks the 6-month anniversary of me moving into my current living space and moving forward towards healing and well being.

Monday, March 30, 2015

Forgiveness, Individual Results May Vary, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of rape (in detail as well as in general), child abuse and neglect, assault, and domestic violence. Reader discretion is advised.

Thursday, March 26, 2015

Olga, Luba, and Vera

Because I do not have any pictures of me before December 2013 any longer, doing a #ThrowbackThursday post seems kind of ridiculous.

Unless you have a wicked story to share, heh.

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Onions, Nylons, and Vera

Ever hear or see something about autistic folks having an issue with certain items? Kind of like the extreme opposite of their interests?

Saturday, March 21, 2015

A New Bicycle, A New Approach, and Vera

I ended up purchasing a bicycle yesterday.

Sunday, March 15, 2015

Judaism, Mentality, and Vera

This is my first blog post done from an actual computer and not my trusty cell phone.  Heh, let's see how this plays out.

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

PTSD, Hypersexuality, and Vera

Trigger/Content Warning (TW/CW): this blog post contains mentions of masturbation, sexual assault, rape, child neglect and endangerment, and derogatory descriptives. Reader discretion is advised.

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Autism, Interests, and Vera

You may have heard or read about interests that autistic folks are into. Some are cute, some are creepy, yes.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

An Idea, You, and Vera

Greetings!

This is my first official run in the blogosphere. I used to run my own website and did a monthly email subscription list, but that's so 2002. Here, my vision is going to be like The Land of the Twisted Minds and The V-Files (website and e-mail sub, respectively) smashed together.