Monday, March 7, 2016

Delaware, De Niro, and Vera

Happy 1-Year Anniversary to the "This, That, and Vera" blog!

Told ya my life is one big azz adventure.

I am composing this blog post on a bus somewhere between Philadelphia and Cleveland, as I am heading home from one awesome weekend.

Awesome, huh?

Heh, yeah.

I got to go into Delaware for the first time ever. Even though it was to visit an equivalent to a state liquor store in Ohio, this part of Delaware looked and felt kind of run down. Not exactly what I had pictured growing up all these years. Nonetheless, it was DELAWARE! I can now die knowing that I have visited the First State.

Did you get any "souvenirs" from that store?

No, for what? I'm not much of a drinker. I will say this: I had the most alcohol consumption in 3 days than I have had in 3 years, at least.

WHOA! VERA HAD BOOZE! HOLY SHIT, STOP THE PRESSES! So, what did you have, or do you remember?

*eyeroll* I had a glass of apple sangria on Thursday, a can chocolate-raspberry beer on Friday, and a bottle of a statewide local light beer yesterday.

Vera, you disappoint me, bruh.

Yeah, and like I said, I don't drink very often.

Let me know when you want to get together. We will have a party and you can get all the drunk and you'll be fine.

What are you, Dear Reader, 21 and hormonal?

I'm just saying, Vera.

*shakes head* Anyways, then there was Friday. My friend, who hosted my visit, found out that there was a grand opening of a state liquor store in a nearby Philadelphia suburb. The plot twist? The ribbon cutting was going to be done by a Hollywood actor named Robert De Niro.

Please tell me you know who Robert De Niro is, Vera. PLEASE.

You're lucky. I am familiar with his acting. After looking up his acting roles, I did see "Meet the Parents" several years ago in theatres. I'm also not much of a movie person.

And then you wonder why you don't get laid and are not currently in a relationship.

Heh, their loss, not mine. Meanwhile, this state liquor store was holding a contest. The first 300 people would get an envelope that had a bunch of coupons and such. Fifteen of those envelopes had a silver ticket to get an autographed bottle of De Niro's spirit, VDKA 6100. Another fifteen envelopes had a golden ticket, which gave that person a private meet and greet with De Niro and get a picture taken with him.

Heh heh, guess which ticket I got?

Don't tell me....

I got a "thanks for coming" ticket.

Awww. And I don't even feel sorry for you.

However, my friend and I did get to do something cool; before disappearing into the background, De Niro was at the main cashier rotunda, and he shook people's hands. I got to shake his hand; my friend got to shake his hand and managed to get a quick selfie with him. I even helped a lady get De Niro to shake her hand. She was reaching out so far, but at first it looked like he was going to pass her up. I managed to shout out, to De Niro: "hey, don't forget about her!" in reference to the lady. De Niro stopped, looked towards my direction, and nodded; he saw the lady desperately trying to reach out, so he came back and shook her hand. After that, the lady grabbed my arm and thanked me about a half-zillion times.
The only thing that bothered me was the grip of the handshake. His grasp was very weak. Is that a Hollywood thing?

I'm surprised he didn't go all out and asked you: "Are you talking to me?"

Um, he is a human being after all.

HE'S ROBERT MOTHER FUCKING DE NIRO! HAVE YOU NOT SEEN "GOODFELLAS" OR "THE GODFATHER PART II"?

No and no. Sorry, but not really sorry.

Remind me to wring your neck the next time I see you, okay?

Okay.

Oh, Saturday was wicked cool, too. My friend and I drove into New Jersey and went to Atlantic City. I got to see the Atlantic Ocean up close and personal for the first time ever. It was really beautiful, more epic than Lake Erie. I collected some shells as my official souvenirs. And the Boardwalk was huge! Great area to get some walking exercise done.

However, Atlantic City itself was a huge disappointment. The only glitz and glamour came from the casinos and such, which hogged up a good section of the coastline in the town. The town (and I say that because the size of acreage is about the size of the city of Lakewood, Ohio, my hometown), for the most part, looked like Euclid Avenue in East Cleveland. It's sad because the casinos can contribute to the welfare of the city by pitching in some dollars to spruce up the town.

Here are some other interesting facts I have learned about New Jersey:

1. On the highways crossing over the Delaware River, you can drive into New Jersey for free. To drive out of New Jersey, however, you have to pay a $5.00 toll charge.

2. If you need to buy gas for your car, it is illegal to pump it yourself. That's right; you can not pump your own gas. Each gas station has attendants that will pump gas for you.

3. There is a reason why New Jersey is called the Garden State: the dirt that is in the state is very nutrient for plants of all varieties to grow in. My friend told me about some of the best tasting tomatoes and corn in the nation come from New Jersey.

So you went to Jersey to see the ocean and you came out as a walking encyclopedia, is that it?

Pretty much. But, check this out:

Something strange happened after we leave the ocean area. All of a sudden I became very sad and disoriented, as if someone ripped my soul off of my velcro chest. At first, I thought it was the fact that I would be going home in a day. So, no big deal right? Later that night, I was awakened by the sound of a nearby helicopter, and I began freaking out. I was disoriented again and very frightened. After taking my emergency anxiety medicine, I looked up what the hell was going on. After a little bit of research, I discovered this: any large body of water (in my case, an ocean) has calming properties that soothe the senses and actually help reduce stimulation (which is probably why most of us Autistic folks are drawn to water like a moth is to an actual flame). Once I was pulled away from the ocean, that's where the pulling sensation occurred. How creepy is that?

Wow, you did a lot on this trip.

And finally, there was Sunday.

My friend and I did rest for most of the day, just collecting proverbial spoons by watching sports and surfing through Facebook. Then my friend got a call that both he and I were invited to his bestie's house for dinner. So we went over and had a very nice Sunday meal; chicken, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, buttered corn, and for dessert mini cheesecakes with whipped topping and chocolate chips. It was very very good.  I got to meet his bestie, her family, and a couple of neighbors who stopped over. A great way to cap off the weekend.

And did you get me anything?

Hell no, heh. You didn't ask prior to me going.

And now, I'm on my way home. See you back in the 216.

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